Good Guys Finish Last

They say that good guys finish last. Of course they do – they always wait for the woman to finish first. Nobody will ever call you good if you finish in two minutes before rolling over and going to sleep. You might get called ‘Two Minute Jack’ though!

If you think about it, the world would be a much better place if only it had more good guys. But of course, that's not going to happen anytime soon. And you know why? Because the very people who like good guys and want everybody to be good actually promote a different kind of behavior.  I know a lot of women who date or are married to good guys. But these very same women who found the goodness attractive to begin with want their guys to be good only to them They are forever egging them on to be more assertive, to bargain more for better prices, to not let anyone cut them off in traffic and so on and so forth. What they don't understand is that a guy can either be good or bad. If he's beating up errant taxi drivers, then it's only a matter of time before he exhibits similar behavior at home.

It's the same at work. All of us say that we like the good guys, but people are constantly told to be more aggressive, to take tough decisions, to not care what happens to their co workers as long as they get the job done. When you keep hearing the same message over and over again, at home and at work, it's bound to leave an impression. I think that we should all encourage the goodness in people a little more - it will eventually lead to world peace.

Diwali is around the corner and there's a big party on at A's place as usual. This has become a tradition of sorts with us where a bunch of friends all meet at A's house for a night of alcohol and firecrackers. It's a little bit different this time though. In the bustle of her day to day life, A has forgotten to invite us. She's not forgotten us, she's simply forgotten to invite us. I know she hasn't forgotten us because my name figures on her list to get the booze and the speakers. I mention this casually to S and he must have ratted to her because two minutes later my phone rings. The caller ID tells me that it is A and I presume that this is my formal invite. I pick up the phone "You bastard, I'll kill you if you don't come" she growls in my ear. "Of course ma'am, wild horses couldn't keep me away after that loving invite".

The party is already rocking by the time we get there and I find that I have lost my wallet. It had some cash in it and a lot of plastic. Sherlock is alive and kicking and I deduce that I must have left it behind at the grocery shop that we stopped at to buy batteries. A few frantic calls later we find that the wallet is not at the shop. It's gone. You can't keep a good man down for long (that's not strictly true - a 'good' guy will go down on you for as long as you want) and I am soon back on my feet with my cards blocked and a glass of rum in my hand.

The party is hotting  up. There is a bunch in the corner doing shots. They have the glasses lined up and are repeating them at about 5 minute intervals. One, two, three and then I lose count. I wonder what the heck they are thinking - they look too ugly not to be smarter than that.

The firecrackers are a blast. There are a lot of them and the kids go berserk. The sky is filled with light, the night reverberates with sound and the air is foggy with smoke. Finally Se says it's time for the grand finale.  It's a box about three feet long and a foot wide and high. What is it I ask him. It's supposed to go up he tells me. Well, this is getting interesting: It's big, it goes up and then it explodes!  Hmmmm it almost sounds obscene.

We make our way back inside to find that I have been right about the shots. There are horrible sounds coming from the bathroom and I see a couple of people passed out on the beds. That does not deter the rest of us and we continue with our karaoke. The night ends in the wee hours of the morning with some excellent dinner. Another great Diwali; Except that I have to be at work the next day!

The door bell rings early the next morning and a good Samaritan has brought back my wallet. It's missing all the cash, but at least my cards and my license are intact. Thank you God.

Happy Diwali.